There is no worse feeling, either as player or GM, than the rest of the table ignoring your story moment. So if that’s ever been you, pour one out for Inventor, the ancient construct from that weird vampire city a few comics ago.

I believed the damage to my cranial plating wrought by the passage of time erased parts of my memory. However, the wireless signals emanating from Aqua Vitae seem to have restored much of the missing data. I was manufactured millennia ago by that dread city’s vampiric rulers, made to serve as an instrument of their insatiable thirst. As they slumbered, my siblings and I were commanded to ‘gather resources.’ We could only do as we were bid, bringing still-living victims to doom and exsanguination at the hands of the city’s l33t. It was a moral abomination. Yet as obligate pacifists, we could do no harm to our masters. At least not directly. That is why I invented the artifact, the TorpOrb. Only by placing our builders in a state of perpetual slumber could we resist their depredations. Many good constructs experienced rapid unplanned disassembly before I could activate the device. Yet through their sacrifice, an empire of blood and malice was sealed away for untold centuries. Now you alone remain, High Admin Buckle. I beg you to aid us in the recovery of the TorpOrb before all is lost. We cannot unleash upon an unsuspecting Handbook-World the evil that now slumbers beneath the waves. 

Hey Swash! Wanna steal Bard’s box of balladeers? We could set up karaoke on the ship! 

 

 

Please, High Admin Buckle. This is serious! 

 

 

What sort of thing is a High Admin anyway?

 

 

They were once the magistrates and judges of Aqua Vitae. As the last Scion of the Server, only the High Admin Buckle possesses the security clearance to—

 

 

Hear that, Buckle? Magistrates and judges! Sounds like our robot pal is calling you Lawful. 

 

 

U Wot M8!?

 

.

Bleh. Karaoke and barfights sound like more fun than talking heads. I skipped most of that first paragraph myself. I’m sure it’s just a bunch of fluff. If there are cyber vampires coming to invade Handbook-World, I’m sure it’ll be nothing to worry about. Super easy. Barely an inconvenience.

What about the rest of you guys? Have you ever found yourself trying to deliver some plot-critical info, only to be met with indifference? What are the techniques for more interesting exposition? Or are we GMs doomed to a take a steaming data dump every time the story needs to move forward? Hit us with all those tips and tales down in the comments!

 

A Huge, Huge Thank You!

Handbook passed a massive milestone this month and we are so incredibly grateful for your continued support of our comic! It’s been an absolute pleasure to create and we’re so excited to keep it going for you all in the future. I don’t know that I’ve ever been able to say that a million people have seen something I made before, and it’s weird and awesome all at the same time. So, from me and Claire, thank you all SO MUCH. We could never have anticipated this in our wildest dreams.

It has been one of the great pleasures of my life talking shop with all of you. Your creativity, dedication to the craft, and generosity are nothing short of inspiring. I’ve always hoped to make something out of words that other people could love. So with wonder, and with joy, and with sincerity: Thank you for making my dream come true.

 

ARE YOU AN IMPATIENT GAMER? If so, you should check out the “Henchman” reward level over on The Handbook of Heroes Patreon. For just one buck a month, you can get each and every Handbook of Heroes comic a day earlier than the rest of your party members. That’s bragging rights right there!