Chaotic Naughty

Whether it’s Yuletide, some kind of Midwinter Feast, or a simple solstice celebration, you can bet your last gold piece that your GM is planning a holiday themed adventure. I’ve seen players take on gingerbread golems, Christmas treants, evil ice sorcerers, Krampuses (Krampussen? Krampii?), and watched my fare share of hardened adventurers save Christmas in the grand tradition of the after school special. These are generally fun, flavorful adventures with some unusually nice loot at the end. I mean, who doesn’t like presents, amirite? But if you happen to play in an evil campaign, there are few monsters more terrifying than Santa.

Dude’s able to know if you’ve been bad or good, which leads me to believe he’s got paladin levels. That would also explain his red-nosed bonded mount. He’s clearly got some kind of scrying device too. How else could the old creeper know if you’re asleep or awake? Most worryingly of all he flies around depositing gifts to all the kiddies in all the world in a single night. He’s either got time control or ridiculous super speed. Either way, we’re talking about demigod level power here, and that’s not even taking his legions of elves and their toy soldier constructs into consideration.

If you’re evil, my advice is to throw in a few random acts of good in the weeks leading up to the holidays. Help an old lady across the street. Refrain from punching orphans. Maybe even give candy to a baby. It might not be enough to get you sweet holiday loot, but it should throw off the naughty/nice bookkeeping. With a little luck, you won’t get run over by a hypersonic voyeuristic philanthro-paladin.

 

ADD SOME NSFW TO YOUR FANTASY! If you’ve ever been curious about that Handbook of Erotic Fantasy banner down at the bottom of the page, then you should check out the “Quest Giver” reward level over on The Handbook of Heroes Patreon. Twice a month you’ll get to see what the Handbook cast get up to when the lights go out. Adults only, 18+ years of age, etc. etc.