Knowledge is Power
It’s tough to roll a 72 on a twenty-sided die. However, as our friends from Exalted are so fond of saying, anything is possible. By way example, here are a few of the more difficult tasks you can attempt in 3.5 D&D:
- Balance on a cloud: DC 120
- Climb on a perfectly smooth, flat ceiling: DC 100
- Use Diplomacy to make a hostile foe a fanatical follower: DC 150
- Detect surface thoughts with Sense Motive: DC 100
- Use Escape Artist to pass through a wall of force: DC 120
You read that right. It’s possible to be so good at getting out of grapples that you can phase through barriers of raw magical energy. Of course that’s not the most absurd use of Escape Artist.
All of the above is fairly amusing, but it does present a problem. I’ve seen DMs freeze up the first time a PC rolls a 40+ check. I’ve seen STs do the same in d10 System. I mean, if the rule book describes five successes as a “legendary result,” how are you supposed to describe ten successes? Or twenty? What happens when your players have to roll their dice pool with a bucket? Do you just use more adjectives? Queue up the laser light show? Because I’ve seen PCs turn solid rock to lava on a miss. I’ve seen PCs so pretty that they blind lesser mortals in passing. I’ve even heard rumor of a PC who rolled so high on Notice that they realized they were only a fictional character inside an RPG. These things happen. As a GM, you have to know how you’re going to respond. (Hint: Never be afraid to invoke the Mythos.)
So how about you guys? What’s the most ridiculously high roll you’ve ever seen in a game? How did the GM deal with it?
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Wait… if the human mind can’t conceive that *question*, what does that make Fighter? Question also applies to Colin.
I don’t even remember the circumstance or the game system, but I do have a memory of being in a situation where for some reason I was rolling a lot of dice in an “exploding 1s” setup and being told I needed to stop rolling so we could move on with our lives.
I also have an amusing story that involves specifically NOT rolling dice that sorta fits. My friend and I were part of a gaming forum for a specific system (that isn’t particularly well balanced mostly because they ignored 50% of our suggestions). There was a challenge set to see who could design a character that would do the most damage, basically an attempt to find out what the most broken things in the system were. Given the specific wording of the setup, there was a single opponent with infinite hitpoints and the setup called for “average” rolls or something along those lines. Basically it worked out they’d asked for just the wrong thing to allow us to get a result that was….. a character that on “average” (the way “average” was defined in the challenge) killed the monster with infinite hitpoints……. 11.5 times. I believe on round 1.
I may appear fully human, but I do have the “gamer” template. If my experience in high school is anything to go by, that does make me an outsider.
clever wordplay there, Colin.
Too clever! Abort! Abort! Self-depreciation reaching critical levels!
I was told of a monk? who had an AC of 85. He had the whole party try, and fail, to hit him.
Yeesh. It must take a lot of wax on, wax off to build up that kind of AC. Any idea how this monk of yours was built?
Out of adamantine?
“Adamantine tortoise style!”
*does dramatic poses. tuns into Colossus.*
In Pathfinder a Champion 10, Synthesist 20 (a Summoner archetype) can be nigh impossible to hit or damage. IIRC this asshole can, with a ritual/spell, go from being a Huge monster with AC ~70 and trip and grab attacks to a Medium monster who also has ~70 AC, but is immune Acid, Cold, Electricity, Fire & Sonic with concealment in bright light and total concealment in anything else.
(The mythical stuff is just gravvy, it is still bonkers without it)
I can really understand why that archetype was banned from organized play. 😛
I’ve always felt that, at some point, having a perfect defense is a bad idea. Dominate Monster happens, and unless your pal the Batman wizard thought to put some kryptonite in his spell component pouch, your munchkinry has just caused a TPK.
You’re right about synthesist though. The archetype has an awful reputation for power gaming, though it’s the fluff that bothers me more. I mean, you could go riding around inside a translucent rhino or some huge celestial knight or even a freaking dragon, and instead you choose a blob with seven tentacles and three butts because it does more damage. Bleh.
Hehe, I never even read the fluff. I heard how silly the class was and just had to see how much different stupid things you could stack (a LOT, it turned out).
We have a Slayer in our party who’s stealth checks are typically in the 60s. With that plus hide in plain sight and sniping he can stay completely unseen against anything without blind sight. Luckily, he doesn’t have the patience for one attack per round so he always breaks stealth first turn.
Well hey, good on him for self-imposed limitations. I think that’s the only way you can actually play one of these insane skill monkeys without having to retire them.
We have two house rules relevant here. One is that if you roll a natural 20, you get to roll again and add up the results. The other is that three d20 rolls in a row with the same natural result, by the same player, causes something to happen. Pity the poor mage who rolled six sixes in a row…he has passed on to legend as the man who still runs from demons, to this day. On the other hand, one of our groups went on a shopping spree when two different players rolled triple sevens in the same session and caused gold to rain from the sky.
Three 20s, depending on exactly what you were trying to do, generally results in a permanent skill-up, but has once or twice ended with a permanent stat-up.
My buddies tell a story straight out of homebrew legend. They baked an exploding dice mechanic into their system, and actually included BattleTech style crit locations and effects. Of course there was a BBEG fight. Of course they managed the triple 20. And according to the chart, that was of course an insta-kill.
Cue the DM: “He is…umm…gravely wounded! He runs away.”
The pitchforks and torches came out soon after.
My friend and I found a way to make a 94 athletics roll (to break objects) in 5e (where an impossible task is supposed to be DC 40).
I believe the result could break a mountain.
I believe you invented D&D&Exalted:
https://keychain.patternspider.net/archive/koc0271.html
I also made a multiclass monster who can kill an ancient dragon during a surprise round!
Hi! Could you elaborate on how can you make Athletics roll of 94? Highest bonus I can figure is +41 – 20th level Bard with expertise in Athletics (+6×2=+12) casts Shapechange (From Lvl 17 Magical Secrets) to change to Leviathan (MToF) with STR of 30 (+10). They are also attuned to Stone of Good Luck (+1) and Ioun Stones of Mastery (+1 to proficiency bonus for +2 total). They also benefit from +1d12 from Peerless Skill for max +12 and +1d4 from Guidance for max +4.
With a roll of 20 that is 61.
I guess you can also add Rod of Lordly Might (button 5) for another +10 to break “through doors, barricades, and other barriers”, although that is very specific, for an increased total of 71.
I haven’t got anything for the question, I just want to say that Wizard looks like he’s about to get a PrC and that shadow tentacles coming from the eyes are cool.
Maybe that’s just my take on it, I’m playing a Pathfinder game where we’re using Sanity rules, modified from 3.5. And my own Conjurer has friends in his head who have decided he’s a little too weak for them, and now their goal is to get him to pass them on to a more powerful mage. It will surely go well.
Thanks! I dig the eye effect myself. It’s been crazy fun throwing a few words at my partner in crime and seeing cool images come back.
Question though. How exactly does one pass along voices? Do you have to headbutt another wizard or something?
You actually have to fit both wizards with an IR scanner. Either that or enact an archaic ritual of sinister origin, as described by the voices themselves. I’ve already sacrificed a lump of flesh for safe passage through The Withering to them, so might as well go whole hog.
If nothing else, it might get them to stop talking philosophy at me and telling me that I’m wrong.
You ever try Exalted? Sort of a similar setup with this background:
http://exaltedpast.wikidot.com/background:whisper
As a GM, I absolutely love having stuff like this as an excuse to talk directly to the PCs.
I clicked on the ‘most absurd use for Escape Artist’ link, I haven’t laughed so hard in the past half a year, excluding one stupid post on Reddit earlier today. Glorious.
You’ll find all manner of absurdity if you begin digging around in the *ahem* anals of 1d4chan.
Herein lies the tale of Fetch, the Half-Drow Ninja. For twenty levels hast she prowled the darkness, striking and fading as a shade. Lo, upon reaching the ninth level, the party did venture forth into the Underdark. Sorry, I mean Darklands. Pathfinder would not dare impugn the copyright of D&D.
Therein, they fought many Drow. Fetch tried to convince the party to let her talk her way through, but they simply Were Not Having It. After slaying the dreadful Drow wizard before the ritual of Lichdom could be completed and capturing his half-formed phylactery to return to the Sorcerer King of Ar’Vahl, a stray Perception check revealed a hidden cavern.
Inside, it was darker then the very depths they had henceforth plumbed. Supernaturally dark, one might say. A mysterious voice spoke to them in the darkness. It called itself the Shadow Lord. It promised power, a power Fetch hungered for. But her rival, the Kobold Sniper Vesehray, sought this power as well. The Shadow Lord offered a contest. The first to return with the heart of a powerful Drow would be gifted a measure of his power.
Sadly, Fetch lost initiative, and her ninja speed was no match for the Vesehray’s potion of Haste. He returned before her and was gifted the Shadow Lord Template, with all the shadowy powers it entailed. Fetch was outraged. She returned to the dungeon and began a bloody task.
One by one, she carved out the heart of every Drow they had slain, placing them in a bucket. Fetch had no love for her erstwhile kin, they having slain her family as traitors and half-breeds. And so she returned to the lightless cave. She presented her grisly gift to the Shadow Lord, and whether through admiration of pity, he gave her a gift. A small vial, filled with swirling black liquid. She thanked him and returned to the party.
After returning to the city, she closed herself in her room and contemplated the vial. She didn’t know what was in it, but she had already died once and was willing to risk another go at it. She drank the liquid.
And that is the story of how my character became permanently incorporeal and got a Stealth mod so high she can dance the can-can naked in front of you without you noticing.
Doubtless you found yourselves in the great drow city of Menzobeercalzone.
Ima need numbers though. How high does that Stealth of yours go? Are you running hellcat stealth or good old fashioned hide in plain sight?
Has anyone else noticed that the absurd use of escape artist mentioned in the blurb is basically a smellier version of the ending of the first Matrix film?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8m_qMDOQIcI#t=03m32s
And then people become his fanatical followers and everything. Damn dude…I think you may be right. Neo is an Arseplomancer!
I have a character whose whole schtick is ridiculous skill check results. He adds his Int to all Strength- and Dexterity-based skills, has multiple skill-buffing spells and magic items, and a class feature that allows him to add his class level to a skill check once per day per skill. He can get Knowledge skill *bonuses* in the low 80s. His Concentration skill bonus can be boosted up to over 100, and he has an attack that allows him to deal twice his Concentration check result in damage. He has a floating feat that he can “prepare” like a Wizard prepares spells, and frequently uses it to get more skill points (Open Minded) or further skill bonuses (Skill Focus, Alertness, etc). He’s an incredibly flexible character and I love playing him.
Neat! What’s the ability called? It sounds like a fun build-around.
I mean, Acheron’s bad, but not C’thulu bad.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acheron_(Dungeons_%26_Dragons)
You mean to say that there’s… The elemental plane of fighting is actually… Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn!
My GM was a player in a Giantslayer campaign, and ended up with a Half-Orc Inquisitor so intimidating that his GM told him that it was literally, mechanically impossible for him to fail to send the final boss of the six-book campaign fleeing in two turns, and made him promise not to do that.
Somebody get that giant a hero’s feast, STAT!
My current party has 3 people good at stealth. Me (the Hunter), the Rogue, and the Goblin. I have a +29 to it. The Rogue has a +45 with an extra +20 if using his Ring of Invisibility. The Goblin has a +70! The only reason the GM even has Rogue and Goblin roll Stealth checks is the possibility of Nat Ones.
We are Team Surprise Round! We’ll be hear all week. You won’t see us though. Try the veal.
As the internet is so fond of pointing out, fumbles on skill checks aren’t a thing in Pathfinder. No sweat if you’re rocking house rules though. 🙂
As far as I’m concerned, the real foil to super-stealth lies in waiting for the player to rely on invisibility. It doesn’t matter how good your check is if you’re sneaking across open ground. The minute the monster turns out to have true sight or tremor sense or whatever, the tables turn in interesting ways. That’s what happened when my pal the vanishing trick magus tried to take on a glabrezu. The consequences were…interesting.
Not so much fumble as just regular fail. And with those two, a Nat one is the ONLY way they fail a Stealth check. We’ve been fighting a lot of dragons though, so the Rogue’s invisibility isn’t always helpful. What with their True Sight and all.
Highest roll I did was in an Ars Magica campaign. It has a system where you roll a d10, but if you roll a 1, you re-roll and double the result… unless it’s again a 1, then you reroll and quadruple the result, unless it’s a 1, and so on.
The GM had us start as apprentice, and at the end of our apprenticeship there was some graduation exercises where we had to write essays about magus skills like “History of the Order of Hermes” or “Hermetic Theory of Magic”. My character’s essay on Hermetic Theory of Magic, I rolled 1, 1, 1, 9, which is to say, a 72 on the die. With Int score and skill, a 80. Something that was far above and beyond what even a grizzled old archmage could hope to write without die explosion.
The best is that two other characters in the campaign also rolled absurdly high results like this, there was a 1, 1, 1, 8 (64) and an 1, 1, 1, 1, 6 (96).
I love Ars Mag’s die explosions.
How did your GM describe the results? Did you wind up breaking new ground in magical theory? Get your own apprentice way ahead of schedule? A fully funded research grant? Thieving professors trying to claim your work as their own?
The immediate result was putting our ramshackle Spring Covenant* right on the radar of the entire order. And yes that did result in the rough equivalent of research grants, though it was more “now we have enough money to build an actual dormitory with real wood and real stone rather than let the apprentices sleep in shoddy old rotten treehouses” than anything for actual research. Still very appreciated.
But we did end up, much later, discovering entirely new magical arts. Normally there are five techniques (creation, destruction, control, understanding, and change) and ten forms (air, earth, water, fire, magic, animal, plant, body, mind, senses), all with Latin names, we’ve discovered a new technique (mixing) and six new forms (light, darkness, emotions, space, time, aether).
*For those who don’t know: Ars Mag has this whole thing where what matters more than the characters is the Covenant, which is both your group of PCs and NPCs and your base of operation. Mages spend a lot of their time doing research rather than adventures, so they need to have a safe place where they can do their research in peace and quiet, without being bothered by the church or the demands of mortal kings, while having mundane servants taking care of mundane needs like food, cleaning, resupplying, trading for mundane resources with the mundane villages nearby without looking too much like they’re working for mages, etc. They also need to accumulate magical resources like weird laboratory apparatus, strange material components, and exotic creatures; and of course most importantly all the books they can find.
Covenants are divided in four seasons:
-Spring: a small group of mages just found a nice plot of land somewhere and started their own covenant. They have next to nothing as far as accumulated resources go, they need to take care of everything including recruiting mundane servants, overseeing construction of their buildings, addressing intendance issues, etc. This eats up their valuable research time and give them a lot of adventuring hooks. A Spring covenant is usually just the player character, at least as far as mages are concerned. There can be a few NPC mages, but they won’t have better stats than the PCs, so the PCs are truly in charge.
Summer: once a Spring covenant has succeeded in establishing itself, become prosperous enough that mundane servants can take care of all the mundane issues so that mages can focus on their research and only adventure for reasons related to their research, the covenant is considered Summer. Summer covenants are healthy and strong, but they have powerful NPC mages and the PC mages are therefore subservient, at least at the start of the campaign.
Autumn: the price of success is complacency, and a Summer covenant eventually turn to Autumn. The accumulated magical resources and decades of experiments have strongly marked the area. Mundane servants don’t look that mundane anymore, and start to have trouble with the nearby villagers. The inquisition might start poking its nose in, and it’ll be the PC’s job to make sure they don’t find anything conclusive. The leadership is made of extremely powerful mages, but they’re getting a bit too quirky and eccentric to do any sort of plausible deniability. Autumn covenants are extremely rich, but there are a lot of other mages in there, so competition between mages for the accumulated resources is fierce.
Winter: an autumn covenant that succumbed to excesses. Few mundane servants remain, as they either became twisted unnaturally by ambient magic and/or local mages, or fled to avoid that fate. Few mages remain, too, because most of them would rather try funding a new Spring covenant somewhere than stay in such a decrepit place. The mages who do remain, however, are extremely powerful, extremely eccentric, and extremely unlikely to care about the PC mages’ complaints. There are a lot of accumulated resources, but they’re largely either ruined, forgotten about, or locked out of reach by the cantankerous NPC mages. The Inquisition is constantly sniffing about, fortunately the area around the covenant is so infused with magic that non-mages tend not to be able to find their way around; but that is also a source of problems.
Then there is a sort of fifth season: a Winter covenant that manages to bounce back to Spring. The place is a ruin, but the insane leadership has finally passed over and that gives fresh young mages the possibility to rebuild, starting nearly from scratch but with a lot of resources that can be somehow reclaimed just by adventuring at home. This was basically the scenario for our campaign, our apprentices’ NPC masters being relatively young mages who decided to build a new covenant on the site of a long-abandoned one. Everything was in ruin, the only building left standing was some sort of old fort next near a (magically) gigantic tree.