Dude Looks Like a Wood Elf
I don’t care what anybody says. Elrond’s coronation hairdo was magnificent.
There’s a real problem with the overuse of race-based tropes in fantasy, and Fighter isn’t the only one with the hangup. It seems like every dwarf is Scottish and every elf enjoys nancing down the pike. Case in point, I once made the grievous error of allowing my players to invent a new item called The Book of Racial Stereotypes. It’s full of illustrations with names like “typical dwarf, female” and “typical half-elf, male.” They use it to insult one another’s heritage (“It says here that elf children aren’t weaned until they’re 35!”) and to gain a +2 in drawing composite mugshots.
Of course, if any of you feel a burning need to write Wizard/Fighter fic, I do have a resource for you. As this comic has forced me to research elven sexuality, I’ve got some TMI courtesy of Professor Tolkien himself.
EARN BONUS LOOT! Check out the The Handbook of Heroes Patreon. We’ve got a sketch feed full of Laurel’s original concept art. We’ve got early access to comics. There’s physical schwag, personalized art, and a monthly vote to see which class gets featured in the comic next. And perhaps my personal favorite, we’ve been hard at work bringing a bimonthly NSFW Handbook of Erotic Fantasy comic to the world! So come one come all. Hurry while supplies of hot elf chicks lasts!
At least they aren’t as ambiguous as gnolls
lol. I just double-checked the Pathfinder SRD. There is no mention of the words “male” or “female” in the listing. I like to imagine a developer opening up the Wikipedia page on hyenas, reading the entry, closing it, and then quietly staring at his bestiary entry with a look of consternation.
It’s not really relevant, but this made me remember a little scene I thought up when I was making my half-orc character. He and his friends (all full orcs) go into a tavern and see a goblin hit a half-elf on the head with a glass tankard. The orcs laugh and tease her, calling her weak. But he notices that she had stolen the goblin’s coin purse. And that the glass tankard didn’t even have a crack in it.
Hey, if you’re an elf drinking ‘Ard Ladz Tavern, you’re probably tougher than you look in the first place.
She’s a Monk who can kick ass just fine. She just didn’t feel the goblin was worth the trouble.
Sounds like she was sitting in a greenskin bar though, what with all the orcs and goblins. Seems to me like she’s looking for trouble. Either that or she’s doing her best Samurai Jack impression:
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-DG-2NLMZsY/hqdefault.jpg
Not so much greenskin as every skin. The barkeep is an Ifrit who used to be a wizard and the barmaids are Catfolk, Aasimar, and Undines. As long as you can pay and keep the fighting outside, they don’t care what race you are. I’m thinking of starting another novel…. that will probably never get finished.
Best writing advice I ever got was from Ray Bradbury. Dude told me, “Write every day, every day, every day.” Doesn’t matter how long it takes as long as you keep chipping away at it.
I’ve still got that letter from Mr. Martian Chronicles hanging over my desk. 🙂
Oh, I write everyday. I just don’t write the same story everyday.