Personally, I think that a Cheezo-stained character sheet denotes a certain artisanal quality. Besides, that’s hardly the worst you’ll encounter in this hobby. There’s nothing quite so jarring as swimming up out of the depths of your imagination, that magical world where you keep company with elven princes and warrior priestesses, to realize that your companions are actually hirsute basement dwellers with owlbear levels of social grace. Don’t get me wrong. I love gamers, and I want to see the community move beyond the stereotype. However, I cannot deny that certain of my fellows lack polish.

You’ve probably seen the longsuffering gentleman from the Grand Prix Richmond Crackstyle meme. I’ve known FLGS employees to keep a bottle of Febreeze under the counter, though I’ve only heard them threaten to use it directly on customers. In my distant past, I can remember pulling a dude aside in a home game: “Hey man, I don’t want to embarrass you in front of the others, but I’ve got some deodorant you could borrow. Do you think you could–”

“Naw man, I smell it too. It’s not me. It’s her.”

He pointed at the ROTC chick that had decided to sit in. One surreptitious sniff confirmed the story. I decided not to confront smelly ROTC chick, which is why I’m still alive today.

How about you guys? Have you ever encountered a socially inept gamer giving the rest of us a bad name? Did anyone call them out on their greasy-fingered, flatulent, unwashed shenanigans?


ARE YOU AN IMPATIENT GAMER? If so, you should check out the “Henchman” reward level over on The Handbook of Heroes Patreon. For just one buck a month, you can get each and every Handbook of Heroes comic a day earlier than the rest of your party members. That’s bragging rights right there!