Deniability
So there you are, plumbing the depths of the desecrated temple like a good paladin. Maybe you’re laying the smite down on a few monsters. Maybe you’re searching for the lost sacraments of P’lot Devyss. Whatever. Point is that you’re down in the dungeon doing your do-good thing when you hear a gut-wrenching scream. From deeper within the ruins wafts the terrified cry of some poor schlub in mortal danger! Of course you rush to aid the weak. And when you round the corner and see this dirt farming peasant stretched out on the altar, you know there’s no time for diplomacy. Not when demon-cultists are about to commit a human sacrifice/altar desecration double whammy!
This is the situation that I presented to my own paladin pal, and he took the bait hook, line, and sinker. Revealing that the sacrificial victim was actually a disguised succubus was a delicious bit of DM deviltry, especially when the sultry hellion went in for the level-draining kiss.
There is nothing quite like the trope of getting-intimate-with-the-monster. If you’ve ever seen The Shining (Caution: NSFW link) you know what I’m talking about. Same deal with the succubus. Same deal with this awful frigging thing. Last time I GM’d a vargouille encounter, I felt absolutely dirty telling my poor bard how this freaky flying head paralyzed her, stuck its tongue down her throat, and deposited its stock of gooey eggs in her stomach. As squicky as that felt from my side of the screen though, I believe it was far squickier on hers.
This is the kind of horror you get from the chestburster in Alien. It’s the same kind of horror these egg-implanting freak shows employ. These kinds of critters are all about violating the natural order, and they’re virtually guaranteed to get a visceral reaction out of your PCs. A word to the wise though: know thy group. You don’t want to spring this kind of creepiness on non-consenting players. The goal is to bring some gross-out horror to the proceedings, not to make your game the wrong kind of uncomfortable.
Question of the day then: Have you ever used the “kissing the monster” trope in a game? Has it ever happened to you? Let’s hear your stories in the comments!
ADD SOME NSFW TO YOUR FANTASY! If you’ve ever been curious about that Handbook of Erotic Fantasy banner down at the bottom of the page, then you should check out the “Quest Giver” reward level over on The Handbook of Heroes Patreon. Twice a month you’ll get to see what the Handbook cast get up to when the lights go out. Adults only, 18+ years of age, etc. etc.
Our players are usually too intent on *purposely* kissing the monsters for those sorts of moments to work. Those Vargouilles are pretty nasty, though.
I think that might be a different trope. Lamias, right?
Hey, it actually makes a suprising amount of sense! I mean, logic dictates that we are just as repulsive to them as they are to us. So really, it is the “kissing the moster” trope, only reversed and weaponized by the PCs.
I’m not saying you’re wrong. I’m just saying that there seem to be a lot more half humans than half dragonborn. Reason dictates we’re the sexy species.
Humans are among the more genetically compatible species out there, able to cross-breed with most other humanoids. Planetouched folks like Tieflings and Genasi are also widely compatible, but their children are always more Planetouched. Dragons are truly the king of progenators though; under 5e rules, any humanoid, giant, beast, or monstrosity can be Half-Dragon.
Lamias, Dragons, Beholders, Winter Wolves…
Well Winter Wolves just makes perfect sense. If you’re that kind of person who goes that one step some of us find one step too far on showing your affection to your dogs.
…
That is NOT the one step I was referring to you filthy minded creature!
My DM did this to me a few sessions ago; he transferred one of the Crones from Witcher 3 (It was the fat one of course.) and my character had met her when she was in a more human form. This is 5e.
Several months back our group was in a tournament to get this Warlock who pacted with Grazz’t, who in turn was someone who was trying to make plans with the BBEG. So we separated to explore the city and my character bumped into someone, DM described it as a pretty girl. She had fallen on the ground and was looking for her glasses, I first did an Insight check and nothing was wrong; however my Psuedodragon was growling and did not like her. So I helped her up, made some small talk, and bid her farewell. DM gave me Inspiration for being true to my character, which should have been my first clue because he’s stingy with Inspiration.
Several levels later we’re going into the Shadowfell to retrieve an artifact connected to a demigod character that the DM has a group of. Right when we get into the area suddenly we get old women voices in our heads and my character contracts Fleshrot. One of them tells me it will go away if I leave while another wants me to go further in. I trudge on with the group because I want revenge and hopefully get rid of it.
Meet the Crones, the one that reveals that she was the girl I met acts all flirty, and battle starts. I get another disease that covers my face, makes me blind and deaf, and puts my Cha at 1 which to a Sorcerer is a real shitty situation. Have no other options and my character is pissed enough so I turn into a dragon (DM allowed it way back, I love him for it but the poor bastard, haha.). Blindsight from that so I can actually “see” but all my attacks get disadvantage. Miss after miss so I do something that one of the other players (Barbarian) does quite a bit, I try to grapple. Other player hits her with a Hex and disadvantage on Str checks, I’m a Young Red Dragon with a 23 (+6) in Athletics. She has a bad time and I roll high each time, use my now 3 attacks to instead slam her into a wall with no disadvantage. 4d6 each time with a few crits and she hardly did anything during the fight.
I tell ya man, felt great. Told the Barbarian player that I now have a appreciation for grappling. Unfortunately I’m a 10 Str Sorcerer, haha. I’m looking forward to all those Potions of (Frost) Giant Strength that he’s been getting now…
Well hey, with a 1 Cha I’m sure you’d have made a cute couple. Matching set and all that. 😛
I think i remember being in a game where a player, a bard i think, out-seduced a succubus and her group and kinda made it his harem of warrior-princesses. It got kinda weird after a moment. Dunno if it fits that trope. Then again, ive only rarely played in 100% serious campaign due to the nature of the group i had in highschool.
I want you to know how hard I’m imagining “The Devil Went Down to Georgia” playing over a seduction battle.
Well the bard did have a clip of “oh yeah” by yello to play at certain times 😛
I had a NPC whose backstory was that she was a succubus that was sent to assassinate the young upstart king of a small kingdom by seducing him. What the demon was unaware of, was that the king was actually a Hide-Carved Dragon/Dragon Ascendant Great Wyrm Gold Dragon. So not only was he well aware of who/what she was as soon as she showed up to court, but completely immune to her attacks. So he captured her, whisked her off to one of the infinite layers of the abyss or whatever, and had a chat with her. Both of them being immortal, it was a long chat until he managed to redeem her and she eventually became a paladin.
This confused the party, who found her to be incredibly attractive, but they were being a good party and she seemed to be the contact they were sent to. When they used “Detect Evil” she had an overwhelmingly powerful aura because she was still a demon (magic sometimes just detects what you physically are), she also pegged the scales on “Chaos” “Good” and “Law” since she was a very powerful paladin. It forced the party to second-guess everything!
Nicely done! I find that an overreliance on the “detect” line of spells has a nasty habit of replacing problem solving skills rather than augmenting them. Reminding PCs that they’ve still got to consider context is always a good thing. 🙂
I’m not sure if this Kissing the Monster, but in one of my Pendragon adventures the party encounter a few Saxon Ax-maidens. The Ax-maidens start to fight the party, and one of the players, who has a high Flirting skill (and the lustful personality trait of 17) tries his flirting skill on the Ax maiden who attacks him. He crits his flirting, she fumbles hers, and so she falls head over heels in love with him. The party, now with an ex-Ax-maiden, defeats the other Ax-maidens, after which the knight proceeds to make the ex-Ax-maiden an ex-maiden, with her complete consent. And he later married her. Later in the campaign, their children, both the boys and girls, became knights in their own right.
I think that falls more under the “Charm Anything” category:
https://www.handbookofheroes.com/archives/comic/charm-anything
Of course, it all depends on the Ax-maiden’s looks. If she’s got the “Plastic Chirurgery Needed” box checked, then it probably counts.
Well, those Ax-Maidens are usually the epitome of the Ice-Queen archetype, so think Elsa, but with more armour and (expertly) handling an Ax.
During a certain Pathfinder Adventure Path, the party encounters a Succubus who was guarding a piece of plot-essential information. Instead of fighting her, the party Bard (of course) tries to parlay, and the price she requests is a night with the (famous) Bard. Fast forward a few years and a Tiefling claiming to be his daughter shows up. Time shenanigans in extraplanar travel means she aged up quickly. She became a bit of a minor antagonist for the party, since she was raised by momma.
Good one liner opportunities there.
“Hold person!” –> “Time out young lady!”
About a month ago, we had to enter a ‘House of Ill-Repute’ because the adopted daughter of an NPC was inside. We all went in together but got split up due to illusions. I’m playing Irlana and Mick the boar and when we enter a room, the GM describes a handsome male Gnome and a female boar. I roll my Sense Motive, revealing the illusion and decide to leave. Mick failed the roll (being a boar) but just wanted food so had no interest. Meanwhile, one character teleported out after running into the succubi while the rest of the party gets tricked. The funniest part was the scene the GM described for our tiefling Rogue. Let’s just say that last year, a PC that turned out to be a traitor and an evil dragon in disguise wanted information and got Rogue drunk. Rogue had joined after the PC turned traitor and didn’t recognize him in character. We started teasing Rogue that he had a ‘type’ and the succubi was disguised as the dragon’s human form. Imagine if a male Harley Quinn became a Swashbuckler.
Oh, the daughter was fine in the end. Mama NPC found her and proceeded to rip the guy she was with a new one.
I choose not to Google image search for “male Harley Quinn.” My imagination is quite full enough of risque fan art already, thank you very much.
I meant more in the jester-style clothing.
We had a “kissing the monster” incident in my Curse of Strahd campaign recently. The party’s warlock had a wereraven boyfriend and they’d been circling one another for the past 10 sessions or so without going any farther than the odd hug. After a particularly grueling battle the adventurers went back to the Winery to get well and truly plastered with the Martikovs and Luvash’s Vistani, and while plastered said Warlock and her boyfriend crept away for some quality “hand-holding” time.
I should mention, this was entirely the Warlock’s player’s idea. Which made it all the more hilarious when I asked her to roll a con save to avoid contracting lycanthropy; which she promptly failed. Since we played this scene outside of the regular session, I received possibly one of the silliest text messages I’ve ever received from my players:
“I thought it only spread through biting… oh.”
The best part about this whole incident was that the rest of the party (in character and out) were completely in the dark about this. So were the Warlock and her wereraven boyfriend to be honest. The Warlock’s player said “Have me shift when I least expect it, it’ll be more fun.” And she was right.
When her Warlock was about to call down Eldritch fire on a stone golem only to poof into a corvid instead, the party’s reaction was wonderful. So many glares at the poor, baffled wereraven. So much bawdy humor about “a quick peck on the cheek was it, honest!”. Good times.
*was all it was
Lycanthropy is one hell of an STD.
Yeah… the cleric has decided that her post-campaign mission is to develop a lycanthropy vaccine. Or failing that, condoms.
The Warlock, on the other hand, is quite pleased with being a bird. And being immune to normal weapons.