Do you know how many years it’s been since I’ve had a three-die stunt in Exalted? TOO MANY! There’s nothing quite like describing your own badassitude so eloquently that your ST is like, “Yeah, naw. Have an unreasonably large bonus to the roll.” Unfortunately, the big moment this week came at the cost of my own distractibility. Lemme explain.
So no shit there I was, mortal sorcerer with a thing for fire. Dude is from Chiaroscuro; vaguely Arabian Nights themed setting. We were fighting some filthy bandits, and my sorcerer was frustrated that his new spell was taking so long to cast. I stunted by cursing the name of the ifrit lord who’d “””taught””” him this new terrestrial circle sorcery, Flight of the Brilliant Raptor. (If you’re not familiar, Exalted is very animu with its spell names.)
In any case, the three-die stunt in question came in the form of an elaborate insult (NSFW language). Ahem:
Kheellada! Why is this taking so long? I was promised fire! I was promised a smoking hole in the ground, not some useless glow bulb. May you be smited by fate, you birthday cake topper! I hope your court is broken and lost! Your spark extinguished and drowned in the Western Pole! You lowly glow worm! You flaming dung beetle! Your mom’s sister’s itchy asshole mated with an unlit torch and birthed you! Let the Incarnae afflict your father with a limp wick, you smoking bag of rancid offal left upon the front stoop of a beggar!
I would like to channel my negative intimacy for unwashed persons.
I would like to use a willpower.
I would like the fiery bird I was promised Kheellada, you forsworn oil-lamp filled with yeddim fuck!
It was exhilarating. It was cathartic. Some days I’m really happy I’m good at accents.
In any case, here’s where THE POINT comes on. I may be OK at improv, but there’s no way I’m good enough to improvise all that. You see, I’d spent my downtime in combat writing that biz out. And while I did so, I know I wasn’t paying attention to my compatriots and being a good audience like I ought. (A certain artist of my acquaintance has a similar habit with drawing-at-the-table.) No one is being bothered during these semi-related-to-the-live-game-as-it’s-happening pastimes. We are doing game-related things. But even so, while focused on our own activities we aren’t giving the game our full attention.
So I put it to you, good denizens of Handbook-World: As good gamers, when is it OK to be distracted at the table? Is there a hierarchy at play? For example, being on your scryPhone is bad, but re-reading rules is just part of the game? Posting game-related memes in the group discord is kind of distracting, but unrelated ones are unacceptable? Where do you draw the line when it comes to distracted gaming? Shout out your own do and do-not examples down in the comments!






Well, I draw the line at when it affects others negatively. For example, if your turn is the next one, and you’re thinking about something else, then you’re going to slow down the whole thing because you won’t be ready (especially bad if you’re playing a character with lots of options like a wizard). If your fellow player’s epic speech has a part about your character, and you fail to react because you were brushing up on your grappling rules, it would spoil the moment. And so on.
Another factor is how blatant whatever you’re doing is. If you’re daydreaming, well, you’re just daydreaming. You’re still looking in the general direction of the table. If you’re on your phone however, then there’s a shining square of light right into your face that’s screaming “HEY I’M NOT PAYING ATTENTION RIGHT NOW”. I think that’s the reason why some people are so opposed to phones.
Also the uncertainty ; if you’re reading one of the rulebooks, you’re for sure doing something related to the game, even if it might not be relevant to what’s immediately going on. With a phone though, you COULD be looking up some rules… or you could be doing something totally unrelated. No way to know, and thus it’s more grating to someone that notices.
Yeah, i prefer live gaming, but I played a lot of Exalted in PbP forums in the past, and while that does have a lot of downsides, it does have the big advantage that you’ve got time to think about (and even wordsmith) your stunts. Had a sorcerer who recited an appropriate haiku as part of his spellcasting, and while I had a number of them prepped in advance (I have a lot of time to think on my commute), having time to tweak the wording while writing a post helped a lot.
As to distraction, that’s definitely one of the challenges of not being at a table these days. Playing face to face, you’re focused… there aren’t many distractions, since getting your phone out between turns is kind of rude. But online, you’re sitting in front of a computer with all the other things it can do, and nobody can see if you’re tuning out. Though the Discord chat thing… I don’t mind that, because for us, it’s more likely to be relevant images rather than memes (and yes, a drunken bear is more relevant than it should be).
And all four of those notifications are ‘@everyfang’.
You spent someone else’s turn planning out what *your* PC would be doing? So that when your turn came, you didn’t spend five minutes composing a speech while everyone else sat and twiddled their thumbs, silently wishing you would hurry up and finish your turn?
That, my dear woman, is NOTHING to be ashamed of! (The cussing, on the other hand…)
Seriously, I think you *should* be planning out your actions (and speeches) during other players’ turns. Pay enough attention to them so you know what’s going on, you your action isn’t completely at odds with theirs, but also spend some time so that when your turn comes, you’re not dithering for 10-15 minutes just trying to decide what to do (yes, I’ve had players take that long).
I’m a player in a Roll20 game, and while the other players are taking their turns, I’m typing out my actions in a separate text file so I can quickly copy/paste into the Roll20 chat window when it’s my turn. I frequently have to change my actions several times before my turn rolls around, but I can usually resolve my turn in 20-30 seconds.
It seems like, as a general rule, being distracted by things that will contribute to the game this session is probably fine. (Stuff that will apply to later sessions, like plans for your next level-up, are probably still rude.)
Oh, and actually-important life things like updates on how your friend who just went to the hospital is doing (though in many of those cases, it might be better for you to put it entirely out of your mind for an hour or two).
Once thou pulleth the Holy Pin, the most Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch is no longer deemed to be of fair aquaintance and thou must lobbeth it with great haste lest ye be caught up in the Divine Wrath it brings.
Given that a large portion of my gaming times have been in the steadfast and entertaining company of half drunk undiagnosed ADHD patients with borderline Tourette’s Syndrome, I’m not at all annoyed by minor delays.
Rather, I’m quite pleased when any character action goes through to completion, whether it was the way it was planned or not.
“Rather, Iām quite pleased when any character action goes through to completion, whether it was the way it was planned or not.”
From my recent session notes:
“‘There are stairs that you can go up or you can go down. But that would require one of you to do something.’ – DM”
Around my table that would probably have gone…
DM “There are stairs that you can go up or you can go down.”
P1 “What are they made of ?”
DM “Uummm stone, why ?”
P1 “I might want to burn them to stop anyone following us”
P2 “What pitch are they ?”
DM “What ?”
P2 “I need to know how far apart the treads are so I know who they were made for”
P3 “You don’t want the same guy I had do mine making them, he soaked me good”
P4 “Anyone want the last Keiths (local beer) ?”
P2/P3/DM “Keiths will kill you !!”
DM “Right, which way are you going, up or down ?”
P3 “I’m checking each step for loose treads and hidden doors”
DM “That’s a round for each step, there are three stories up and two down”
P2 “I’m going to rest and memorize spells while he does that”
DM “You only used two cantrips so far”
P2 “I want to make sure I have all of them ready”
P3 “I’m still pissed off at the job that guy did, half of them squeak”
P4 “I’m going outside for a smoke while he searches”
P2 “stand by the window so we can still hear you if something happens”
DM “Alright, search going up or search going down ?
P4 “Hey, SQUIRREL !!!”
Everyone runs to the window, including the DM…
The other two players just sit shaking their heads and split the last Keiths.
…oh man, being distracted is a problem I suffer from badly as a player. The best part of running the game is that I’m involved with the game at all times, which is GREAT for my focus.
Meanwhile, I’ve got a player with THE WORST sleep schedule, and I remember having to ask if the reason they weren’t participating was a me problem or a them problem. It was a them problem.
Ambush alley, summoner used that place š
Honestly, as someone who is extremely ADHD, I am always multitasking at the table. In fact I’m at a session as I write this. As long as you’re not disrupting the session by talking about it, and you’re paying enough attention have some idea of what’s going on, I’m fine with it.
I prefer to call ADD ‘multitasking’ and my very minor OCD as ‘attention to detail’ š
I almost exclusively play and DM online these days (moving countries twice does that to your existing groups), and it has its own challenges of distractions – you are playing while sitting in front of your computer after all.
Usually my rule of thumb is, as long as you are aware of the situation and what’s happening, you’re fine. If you need to be called out 2-3 times when it’s your turn in combat, or trying to attack enemies that have been long dealt with, or in general show obvious signs you don’t know what’s happening, that’s not good.
There are of course acceptable exceptions. If you’re distracted cause you’re waiting for a message about how’s your grandma’s operation went, or you need to answer the door cause the neighbour is checking if their cat climbed through your window, well, as long as you let us know as soon as possible (like, before game tell us you’re waiting on an important text, or when the doorbell rings drop a line that you need to brb for a minute).
Well… if you’re not working out your next turn before your turn comes around, you are the reason NOTHING GETS DONE in six hours of game, soooo…
I’m the ST in this story, and I feel I must give some context.
Claire gave that angry rant without pausing for breath. It was *spectacular*, and I wish I had a recording.