Epic Level NPCs
“The ultimate aim of the game is to gain sufficient esteem as a good player to retire your character—he becomes a kind of mythical, historical figure, someone for others to look up to and admire.” That bit of wisdom comes courtesy of Gary Gygax his damn self, and there is no greater grognard in all the land. Of course, the theory only applies to player characters. If you have the misfortune to be born a non-player character, your options are slightly more limited.
Your average NPC can look forward to a short and miserable existence getting murdered by the PCs, robbed by the PCs, or knocked out cold, tied up, and impersonated by the PCs. And if by some miracle they should ever come out on top, five out of six people at the table will declare it “total bullshit.” I think that it’s the native sympathy and humanity of that sixth guy (read: your average GM) which demands a more even playing field. “Why yes, the party. You can try to rob the magic merchant/innkeeper. Sinister laugh, sinister laugh. You can certainly try.”
In all seriousness, the max level shop keeper exists because of rampant murder hoboism. If you’ve got a band of “heroes” making a profit by robbing merchants instead of dragons, it’s only natural to try and course correct. And while I’m tempted to say it’s a bit of an overreaction throwing “Sharkoom the Titanslayer” behind a desk at the local 7-11, there’s no doubt that some parties deserve it.
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In my experience it’s always gone the completely wrong way though, all shopkeeps completely immune to even the slightest hint of trickery and robbery. Makes you wonder how rogues ever managed to get their first level.
I had a beguiler who wasn’t allowed so much as to even charm a shopkeeper for a 5% discount, nor have any rogues I’ve played ever been in a position where they could even snag a small item without being assured if I rolled under a 17 I would be rolling up a new character.
The problem is that “shop keepers” are not NPCs in the traditional sense. They are the fulcrum upon which the economy rests. Messing with them is messing directly with the game balance, throwing gold pieces and expected wealth by level off kilter. While this can result in magnificence…
https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Tale_of_an_Industrious_Rogue,_Part_I
…It can just as easily result is outright munchkinry. Depending on the table I might or might not trust my players to keep things at a reasonable level. But consider this: If you’re running a villainous campaign, how do you keep the average mustache-twirling PC from taking every magic item behind the counter? Police enforcement, magical contingency teleportations, and story-driven “don’t draw any attention to yourselves” conditions all apply. But if a GM gets hit by this kind of behavior on zero notice, the max level shop keeper is the knee jerk reaction. I agree that it’s not ideal, but I think you’ve got to place some obstacle in the way of rampaging loot thieves. So no, I’m not really advocating for “Sharkoom the Titanslayer,” but I do think he fulfills a necessary purpose.
Ok wow that was a good read. Just… yeah. Never give your players access to unlimited anything.
Just finished reading that story.
I’m impressed that it all started when they were level 7, as I’d always assumed the high-end shenanigans required much higher levels.
All you need is an imagination and a GM with a sense of humor. With these ingredients, there is no end to your potential shenanigans!
Last time I had a pc try to steal a magic item, I treated it like a small dungeon. That he was soloing. Traps, armed guards, the works. He succeeded, barely. Equipped his new magical hat and then walked out into public with the magic hat on his head…
Now see, if he was a crafty thief he would have got a hat of disguise to disguise his hat of disguise. Classic mistake.
I have to question why the GM lets all these smitten NPCs try and join up instead of being sent on some sort of love(lust)-fuelled redemption quest.
Means they are temporarily out of the way, and can be brought back later as either allies, or even worse enemies, or fail and die on their quest, of course.
GM? What GM? This is a logically consistent fantasy world, I swear! >_>
The anime “Seven Deadly Sins” is partly based on this trope. The main protagonist is a tavern keeper who used to be the deadliest knight in the army of the Kingdom of Liones until he was framed for murder and had to go into hiding. And this is an action anime so ‘deadliest knight’ means ‘can cut a mountain in half with an unsharpened stick’
BTW, does anyone know if this trope of badass bartenders has a name and if it appears in any other shows or movies or books? I know it must because I was immediately familiar with it when I read this comic; but for some reason Seven Deadly Sins is the only one I can think of. And I’d like to know because I I had an idea for a Dungeons of Dredmor mod with a class based on it but I need more stuff to put in refrences to.
This seems close:
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/RetiredBadass
The bartender from The Shining might be an example.
I honestly don’t see any need for high level shopkeepers. Let PCs to have their fun. Let them murder a shopkeeper and rob his good, let them even crack his safe if they’re smart enough to find it. Maybe they’ll want to do this several times. And then it’s your time to have fun.
First, the party notices that the shopkeepers don’t have any goods better then what the party is already holding. Then, the shopkeeper refuse to buy from party unneeded equipment, because it’s “too hot.” The shops get closed and barricaded as soon as the party enters the town. Then the guards start coming after the party – first they will be easy to beat guys with junk equipment. But then there will be wanted posters all over places, and another adventurers parties start to go for them. And there is in no way should be planned as total party kill, but a very challenging fights. They will not all die, you are not a killjoy. But some of them shall. And this is how it should be. This is the code.