Unfortunately, I’ve already told you guys the story of ROCKET POWERED JELLYFISH SUPER PUNCH GO! While it remains the most flavorful attack of my gaming career, it is not the biggest. That honor goes to the bucket of white mice.

It all started when I was theory crafting methods for killing Cthulhu. While there are other, even-more-spectacular methods for slaying squid gods, this one is mine. I remain quite proud of it because, insult to eldritch injury, you wind up delivering the KO with feather fall.  Here’s the step-by-step:

  1.  Be a 20th level mythic wizard in Pathfinder 1e.
  2.  Get to Mythic Tier 4
  3.  Take Mythic Feather Fall
  4.  Obtain 40 mice.
  5.  Place mice in a convenient container.
  6.  Fly above your enemies.
  7.  Dump mice on your enemies as a ranged touch attack. (Or as a splash weapon at the easier-to-hit empty square.)
  8.  While the mice are mid-flight, expend two uses of mythic power to cast Augmented Mythic Feather Fall on the mice.
  9.  Deal 200d6 points of force damage to your enemies with your mouse grenade.
  10.  Laugh maniacally. (optional)

I’m sure you could really crank this one, but even if you “just” add the maximize and empower metamagic feats, you’re looking at 200d6 –> 280d6 –> all sixes –> 1680 force damage, give or take 40 saves to half.

My GM let me get away with it exactly once in-game, winning my round of an exhibition match in spectacular style. I think there were only twenty-something mice, since we hadn’t hit max level. That turned out to be more than enough though. Happily for the entirety of His Majesty’s Royal Wizard Force, it was a magically non-lethal mouse grenade.

What about the rest of you guys though? What’s your biggest and best hit? Share your most ludicrous kills, biggest bombs, and highest-ever crits down in the comments!


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