Adorabolical
It’s a wolf-in-sheep’s-clothing. It’s always a wolf-in-sheep’s-clothing. Except when it isn’t. This dichotomy is key.
No one straps on a sword and rides off in search of the unknown because it’s safe. You pillage evil temples and plunder horrible tombs because it’s exciting. No matter how high your Sense Motive skill, you’re never quite sure whether that weirdo in the corner is actually an agent of the evil empire. The difference between Strider and Bazine Netal is what makes walking into the bar interesting, no matter how many times we start our campaigns there. Much like flipping through the pages of a good sword and sorcery novel, we don’t know what new wonders wait on the next page or beyond the next die roll. For my money, this is the point of storytelling. We sit and listen because we want to know what happens next. It’s the element of uncertainty that keeps us coming back.
In the case of our poor unfortunate fawn, we’ve actually got different genre expectations bearing down on us. You’re supposed to help the weak, but you aren’t supposed to pick up a duck in a dungeon either. Both of these things are common knowledge. Figuring out which way the story goes this time is the interesting bit. So no, you should never trust the cute thing. But you should probably give it the benefit of the doubt before you start swinging.
Question of the day then. Have you ever been suckered in by a supposedly weak and defenseless critter? What was it? How dead did it make you? Let’s hear it in the comments!
GET YOUR SCHWAG ON! Want a piece of Handbook-World to hang on you wall? Then you’ll want to check out the “Hero” reward tier on the The Handbook of Heroes Patreon. Each monthly treasure hall will bring you prints, decals, buttons, bookmarks and more! There’s even talk of a few Handbook-themed mini-dungeons on the horizon. So hit the link, open up that treasure chest, and see what loot awaits!
Do Gnomes count? My Arcane Trickster was once sleeping poisoned by a cute little gnome butler. Just imagine him, dapper little suit, fat little face looking all prim and proper. I had no chance. I spent the rest of the session playing as Squeak, though, which was a fun time.
Fun fact, Elven ancestry only protects you from magical sleep effects, not poison.
Wow, I never knew that little loophole. I’m gonna use sleep poison on my party’s elves sometime in the near future!
My party learned this little lesson first hand. Friggin’ drow poison…. Escaping from the Underdark has never been so obnoxious.
http://dnd.wizards.com/products/tabletop-games/rpg-products/outoftheabyss
A quick google later and yes. Yes it counts.
https://s.blogcdn.com/blog.games.com/media/2011/04/butler-gnome.png
“They’re miners, not minors.” “You lost me.”
I’m just here to declare before everyone else does that kobolds have always been the penultimate evil in D&D, doing more d6s worth of damage to adventurers from falling onto spikes than any dragonsbreath. My old DM had a high opinion of the little rat bastards, and their ways and means.
Your old DM wasn’t by any chance named Tucker?
(On the off chance that you’re unfamiliar: http://www.tuckerskobolds.com/)
Not directly, but inspiration was heavily drawn from that source, you’re correct. This was the same DM that the original Hibiki Stone came from, so if you were wondering how much of his diet consists of the delicious, salty tears of his players, the answer is ‘A Substantial Portion.’
Speaking as a DM, kobolds are some of the most useful and versatile enemies; they can represent any threat from comic relief to utter devestating. Speaking as a player, I’m glad all of the kobolds I’ve encountered have been in the former category and/or on my side.
Speaking as a kobold and a comic, I approve of this characterization.
Just FYI- Penultimate means ‘next to the last’ not ‘ultimate’. It’s a common grammatical error so don’t feel bad. Just pointing it out. No judgement. Especially if you meant it to mean ‘next to the last’.
And I agree, Kobolds are wicked little b@stards!
As an interesting note, I just started playing in a game where we work for a hilariously evil empire. My character is basically an Eevee that can summon powered armor.
1. I do not trust your character.
2. That is a surprisingly easy google search: http://i.imgur.com/dqk50pb.jpg
Oh yeah. First campain I ever played. Before that I used to think that mimics were just stupid monsters that turned into objects and waited in ambush. No, it never occured to me that younger, medium-sized mimics exist and that they were cunning enough to impersonate a distraught peasant girl…
So what you’re saying is that “The Thing” was a mimic. I believe it. I can also picture her abdomen opening up and biting off your hands.
Obligatory Monty Python clip:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgj3nZWtOfA
Just as there is at least one Monty Python reference lurking within every gaming session, there is one lurking within every comic.
I played a wingless pixie/fairy with a hawk familiar/mount in Rollmaster. Cue detecting a cute, fuzzy bunny in a field. I swooped down, and with a lucky crit, killed a Vampire Bunny in one shot. Otherwise, it’d’ve cleaned our clocks.
Later that same day, we see another,/i> bunny, this time sitting in the middle of the road. I altered my path so the shadow of my hawk passed right over the bit of fuzz. Said bit of fuzz didn’t even flinch. Several ranged attacks later, the completely ordinary rabbit is a smear on the trail.
But seriously, why would a regular bunny sit in the middle of the path?
Dang it! Missed my “undo itallics” tag.
Let us pause now and ask ourselves, “Is overthinking itself the trap?”
http://gallery.burrowowl.net/index.php?q=/post/view/31094